In the midst of filing for divorce, you can easily get overwhelmed by stress, frustration and anger. These emotions can make it hard to see beyond your current situation and make decisions that are in your best interests and the best interests of your family.
As difficult as it may seem, taking some time and making an effort to be more mindful of things outside of your divorce can be of great benefit for you and your children. This approach can help you be kinder, alleviate your anxiety and put things in perspective, allowing you to make better decisions for yourself and your family.
According to a yoga teacher interviewed in this article, there are big and small steps you can take toward mindfulness during your divorce.
- Acknowledge the things you are feeling, and experience them without succumbing to them. Allowing yourself to be sad and cry can be very helpful, but letting the sadness take over can make it impossible for you to be physically and emotionally present for your children.
- Remember your positive attributes. Things like having the capacity to love, gratitude and resiliency can be overlooked when you are consumed by negative feelings and energy. Remembering that you embody these and other positive traits can help you be kinder to yourself.
- Focus on open communication with your kids. You children will also be going through the divorce. Talking to them about what they are feeling, the challenges that may lie ahead and how much you still love them can keep the communication channels open. Be careful not to share unnecessary details about the actual divorce process or any negative attributes about the other parent while doing this.
- Take some time for yourself. Going through a divorce can make it easy to neglect your own well-being. Periodically, you should check-in with yourself to assess the things you may need. Are you making healthy decisions? Do you need to be pampered? What is your state of mind? Do you need solitude or engagement?
These and other mindful efforts can help you escape the chaos of divorce and center yourself to gain some perspective on your situation and the future, if only for a few moments. Even amicable divorces can be very demanding and stressful. However, with some mindfulness, as well as guidance and support, you can get to the other side and begin a new chapter of your life.