Co-parenting isn’t easy for everyone. Sometimes, it will be difficult to get along with your ex-spouse. If you had a negative end to your marriage or are prone to arguments, then even drop-offs or custody exchanges can be tough.
For some parents, there is added difficulty when their children are old enough to have school events that they both want to attend. The good news is that even after a divorce, you can take steps to be at the same event together without conflict.
Positive co–parenting after divorce
After divorce, it’s important to focus on being a positive co-parent. This may mean that you have to set boundaries if you and the other parent don’t always get along. For events, like choir performances, basketball games and others, you and the other parent should work out a schedule and decide if you can attend together, attend together but sit separately, attend together but at different times or alternate who attends which event.
For example, if you can set aside your differences for a few hours, you can probably attend together and sit near one another. If you don’t get along and might argue, then sit separately and still come together to support your child. If neither of you can get along if the other is present, consider coming to the event at different times. For instance, if the theater group is putting on two performances, one parent could come in the morning while the other comes in the evening. Finally, consider alternating if there is no other option. One parent could come to the event this week while the other attends the following week.
There are ways to go to your children’s events without fighting or having a child custody conflict. Discuss those options in your parenting agreement, so you can be there when your children need you.