Bartholomew & Wasznicky LLP
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Sacramento, California

Over 125 Years Of Combined Experience

Mediating your divorce? Don’t walk in unprepared

You and your ex have decided to keep your divorce out of the California courts. Instead, you’ve selected mediation as a positive alternative – and it’s no surprise why. There are many benefits of mediating a divorce and many divorcees prefer it over litigation.

With your mediation session rapidly approaching, you may have anxieties about the uncertainties surrounding it. Rest assured, however, you can put your fears aside by arriving at the meeting being well prepared.

Here are some ways that you can prepare to make the most out of your mediation session.

Consider a variety of outcomes

You and your ex are bound to have disagreements and different points of view. If you go into the room unwilling to budge, you could be setting yourself up for disappointment. Be open to meeting in the middle which can increase the odds of a satisfactory settlement.

Keep your expectations realistic and stay focused on what you hope to gain out of the discussion instead of holding onto things from the past.

Confront your emotions ahead of time

Chances are, emotions you thought were long gone will surface during the meeting. Whether it be frustration, anger, hatred or sadness, you should work on confronting your demons before the day comes.

You may want to seek out counseling or the support of loved ones. Nobody will expect you to keep your emotions at the door, but try not to allow your emotions to get the better of you and cloud your judgment.

Be willing to listen

Make your best effort to listen to what your ex-spouse and mediator are saying. The sooner you begin to listen to what your ex wants out of the arrangement the sooner you can move towards an amicable settlement. You don’t have to like your ex to have a civil discussion in order to part ways. Wait your turn to be heard and you can expect the same in return. Remember, the mediation is there to assist both of you to reach a mutually acceptable agreement.

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