You and the person you love may have a great relationship, except that you frequently bicker about money, and sometimes the arguments get pretty heated. You want to get married, but you are beginning to wonder if money issues will drive a wedge into your relationship even before you are scheduled to walk down the aisle. A friend suggested that you and your intended see an attorney about creating a prenuptial agreement. Could a prenup provide a workable plan? Could it actually bring compromise on the money front?
Different views on finances
The money issues that couples face are often caused because men and women look at money differently, and the reasons usually go deep. For example, you may have struggled with income problems, feeling that you have never been paid enough for the kind of work you do. Your intended, on the other hand, has never had any trouble making money. You are tight-fisted with every dollar, but the love of your life spends freely, which you find worrisome-and that is usually where the arguments begin.
Why you need help
Studies, like the one undertaken at the Department of Family, Consumer and Human Development at Utah State University, point to disagreements over money being at the center of most divorces, no matter the income level of the two parties involved. Since most money issues have their origins in things that are even more profound, arguments about finances can be long-lasting and more difficult to resolve than other marital or relationship issues, as you may have discovered for yourself.
How to approach solving the problem
Psychology experts, among others, say that while it may be a difficult subject to get into peaceably, couples should talk about money and get their views out in the open before they commit to marriage. Money problems can exacerbate weak links in a relationship. Creating a prenuptial agreement is one way of handling this because it outlines responsibilities and goals, and provides a path for you and your intended to follow going forward.
Turning to an experienced guide
Just as communication is essential in any kind of relationship, financial communication will be essential in your marriage. Couples find that when they cannot agree on important matters, a prenuptial agreement can be a great help. An attorney experienced with family law, who understands what leads to divorce and wants to help couples avoid it, can act as your guide and help craft a prenup that works for both of you. The commitment you are about to make to each other should take you happily into forever. You do not want money concerns to put an end to your marriage before it even begins.