In recent years, we have been hearing a lot more about collaborative, almost peaceful divorces. Couples are ending their marriage not out of anger but out of respect.
This trend toward collaboration may be the result of a few different factors, including the fact that divorce is no longer seen by most people as something to be ashamed of or stigmatized. Because of this, it can be easier to look at a divorce as something to improve their lives and not as something that destroys it. This appears to be the stance that one former couple has taken and they have the picture to prove it.
You may have seen the photo, as it has gone viral in the days after the woman posted the picture of her and her newly-ex-husband smiling together outside the courtroom on Facebook. In the caption, she writes that although they are divorcing, they still like each other and will remain dedicated to raising their children together.
This dedication to staying as peaceful and cooperative as possible for the sake of the children can be a very powerful motivator in a divorce. Having this perspective can help parents stay focused on the bigger picture, making it a little easier to deal with the day-to-day encounters with an ex as a parent, even or especially when arguments arise.
Considering how many parents across California now participate in co-parenting, this outlook could help so many people approach divorce a little differently.
Of course there are divorces that are painful and clouded by anger or bitterness, but there are many that are less contentious because the people involved have simply decided to move on to the next chapter of their lives separately. Those in the latter situation may find it helpful to take the approach that many others have taken by seeking a respectful, collaborative divorce that focuses on positivity and protecting family. Using a professional team including mental health and financial specialists helps couples realize what is really important and to make better sound financial and emotional decisions.
If this sounds like something you would like to pursue, you can discuss your options for collaborative divorce and/or mediation with an attorney that has a practice that emphasizes interest based negotiations rather than zealous advocacy
Source: The Huffington Post, “This Couple’s Divorce Selfie Is Surprisingly Sweet,” Brittany Wong, Sept. 1, 2015